Archive for the ‘Visualization’ Category

Learn from a child

Tuesday, January 29th, 2008

My wife and I are not only life partners — we’re business partners too. The nature of our various business pursuits allows us to work from just about anywhere. This is usually a good thing (though my wife is quick to point out that we don’t take many “real” vacations). “Real” vacations aside, we do have the flexibility to be able to go anywhere almost anytime.

For the last few years, we’ve decided we don’t like winters in the Northeast. So we do what a lot of rational animals do — we head south. The last two years, we’ve had to address the issue of school for our daughter. She was in preschool last year and she’s in pre-K this year.

Now before anyone gets the wrong impression, please understand that we know these school years are “optional”, and if we wanted, we could take our daughter anywhere without having to worry about school attendance. But even at 3, 4, and 5 years old, our daughter wants to go to school. She’s the one that decided she wanted to go to a “new” school when we traveled (not the other way around). Our daughter is very special, and yes, that’s a biased opinion.

Anyway, yesterday was her first day at her new school. She’s normally very excited about her first day, and she really looks forward to meeting new teachers and new friends. This time, though, she seemed a little apprehensive. When I asked her about it, she thought for a bit and said “Daddy, at first you’re always nervous, but then before you know it, the new kids are your new friends”.

Did I mention that she’s five?

Here’s a child that’s faced with new faces and a new environment. Like any of us, she’s done this kind of thing before, but she’s still getting a little nervous. She could have resisted, or kicked and screamed, or cried — all things we’ve seen nervous kids do in similar situations. But instead, she played out the scenario in her head, she visualized how she saw it happening, and she saw herself experiencing nervousness and anxiety before ultimately experiencing good things — new friends.

When I went to pick her up in the afternoon, she was on the playground running and playing with a large group kids. She was having a blast! During the car ride home, she told me all about her “great!” day and her new friends. The first day was a huge success, and she’s really looking forward to tomorrow.

So what can we learn? We know that everyone faces situations that make them nervous or anxious. We all have to face things we might not be looking forward to (even when we thought we wanted to do them). The key to having a successful, happy experience (as opposed to a disaster) is to go in knowing the challenges but having a plan to address them. We go in with a healthy, positive attitude, and we use our imagination and visualization skills to experience the positive results beforehand. We do successful “dry runs” before the actual event.

Great athletes do this all of the time. Great salespeople do it. Great speakers do it. Kids can do it too…and we can learn from them.

Someday I’ll tell you all about my son who will be attending the United States Naval Academy next year.  I learn from him almost every day, and he’s a wonderful young man.

Yes, that’s a biased opinion.

Different Circumstances; Different Approach

Monday, January 28th, 2008

In my business (one of them), there are many industry “standards” that don’t make a whole lot of sense. One of those is the “rush”.

A client will call in, or fax, or email an order, and somewhere on the order will be the word RUSH. Better yet, we often see SUPER RUSH. What does this mean?

RUSH can mean a bunch of different things. It can mean “I need it in ten days” (in which case it’s not a rush), or it can mean “I need it today” (most certainly a SUPER RUSH). Without more information, it’s impossible for us to know.

Most of my competitors address the RUSH quandary by simply picking their own delivery date. “I guess he needs it in a couple of days…” That makes a lot of sense, right? (No wonder we run circles around our competitors).

We call the client and ask for a specific drop-dead date. Sometimes a rush really isn’t. By calling, we’ve clarified the time-frame and we’ve saved everyone a lot of headaches. We’ve also had a chance to be professional in the eyes of our clients.

In these kinds of circumstances, it is absolutely imperative that you get as much detailed information as possible.

When it comes to your goals, the opposite is true (almost). Yes, you want to make your goals specific. Yes, you want to have a deadline. Yes, you want to be accountable along the way. I’m not suggesting that you “wing it” entirely.

But I am suggesting that you allow room for a little “faith”. What’s this mean?

It means that you pick a goal, you pick a deadline, and you let the rest work itself out. If you choose your goals wisely, and if you allow all of your senses to get actively involved (“I can see my success, I can feel it, I can smell it, I can taste it”), if you can visualize your world once you’ve succeeded in reaching your goal, your brain will take care of the details.

If you’ve read The Secret (good book), or if you’ve read any of the many books that discuss the Law of Attraction, you know that there is this idea of “the universe” and “vibrations” at work. The Universe responds to the vibrations (the feelings) you’re putting out, and it delivers that which is most dominant in your mind. The Universe works in the background, and it works in profound ways.

Whether or not you understand or believe in these ideas, I know you’ve experienced something good that “just happened”. You can’t explain it; you didn’t put any effort into it. It “just happened”.

That’s often a result of your mind working in the background to untangle some problem or address some challenge. Learn from this kind of experience; let your mind do its thing.

When setting goals, it’s often best to set a really big one and let the rest work itself out. A common example of this is when Kennedy proclaimed that the US was going to the moon by the end of the decade. We didn’t have the technology, we didn’t know how we were going to do it, but we knew we were going to. We accepted this on faith. We took the leap.

Sometimes you need to drill down to the finest, most minute details in life. But sometimes, especially when it comes to the big picture, you’ve got to just let it happen.

Resolution Meltdown

Thursday, January 17th, 2008

It’s that time of year again…time for those New Year’s resolutions to be tossed out the window! You failed, baby!


Oh, the disappointment. The frustration.

Week Three of the New Year is when gym attendance levels drop back to normal, diet commercials on television are replaced by commercials proclaiming “diets don’t work”, and that snazzy new organizer is lost in a pile on your desk. What happened?

First, realize that you’re not alone. There’s a reason the gyms get quieter, diet commercials go away, and so on — this is a very common time period for “failure”. Some “experts” say that for a habit to have any chance of becoming permanent, one must engage in said habit for 21 days. Others claim that 30 days is the magic number. Regardless of which number you choose, you’re getting close to prime fail time.

Personally, I think 30 days is the time you should invest in any change in your life. But! I also think that 21 days is the center of the “trap”. This is the time period where failure is most likely, and as such, it’s the time that we really need to put our heads down and stay the course.

Before you give up, and before you get depressed and down on yourself, remember to take another (fresh) look at your resolutions. Is each one really important to you? Can you see, hear, taste and smell what it feels like when you reach your goal? Are you visualizing success? Do you still get excited by suceeding?

Some of those resolutions might have been decided in haste. Reevaluate, double check the plan of attack, and enjoy the feelings today that success will bring tomorrow. Stick with the resolutions that make sense and toss the others guilt-free.

Psychological Stunts

Wednesday, January 16th, 2008

Brad Isaac is sharing a series he calls 101 Goal Setting Breakthroughs 2008.

Today he writes about visualization and optimism and how both relate to achieving your goals. In typical Brad fashion, he has a lot of ideas! Check out today’s post here.

I’m going to let Brad do the talking today (and I’m going to engage in the dreaded “yeah, what he said”…see the archives if that line confuses you). Anyway, I’m going to spend the day like I did yesterday — celebrating the birth of a son to our close friends Sami and Jacqui.


Check out Big Buts

Friday, January 4th, 2008

No, that’s not a typo. It’s “but” — not “butt”.

MillioniareMommyNextDoor features a great post today — read it here.

I want to be happier, but…

I want to make more money, but…

I want to, but…

You get the idea. Too often we make excuses as to why we “can’t” do or accomplish something. The reality is actually quite different: we can do anything we choose to do.

When you decide, it will be done. Whether you decide to do, accomplish, succeed, or overcome, when you really decide — when you make the commitment to yourself — it’s a done deal.

I’ve experienced this in my own life, and more importantly, I’ve seen it in lives around me. This isn’t something that “works” for me or someone else — it simply works.

Reality is inside your head. Our society tells us that reality is the “real world”, and for most in our society, the real world is not such a nice place.

But reality is what you make it. How you perceive the real world is your reality. Your thoughts, your desires, and your intentions are all determining factors in your reality. You have complete control over these things if you choose to exercise it.

Look at the world the way you want to see it. See yourself the way you want to be. Visualize your perfect reality, and the “real world” will follow suit.